Saturday, 28 June 2014

One Brave Vet and a Bottle of Sedative!

The unicorn has issues with his teeth, usually we find them attached to something like an arm or part of a human. However, I did think he  may have bigger issues, so it was time to call the vet. As with everything vets are often chosen due to reputation, and thats how Ricardo entered our world.

The vet arrived and instantly I liked him, so he was allowed to come into the property. After a long chat about his history, experience, and whether he was married or not....well a girl has to know these things! He met the unicorn. magic instantly adored him, which was a good sign, and didn't try to bite him at all.

It was decided that his teeth needed rasping, obviously magic's and not the vets! and after a debate sedation was decided upon. Magic slowly drifted into a deep sleep, but still he wanted to show who was boss, and decided that he didn't want the hannibal lecter contraption in his mouth!

So, three people, lots of sedative, and a struggle later we were ready to start up the power tool! Rasping is really noisy, and all the time you have to hold the horses head up, holding its tongue, and getting extremely close to the vet! Well I had to assist, although holding the tongue was left to my daughter.

Once we had finished, we all retreated out of the stable, and left magic to wake up, oh boy and when he did he was pissed off. But his teeth had ben rasped, so one more thing off the tick list. is he still biting, hell yeah but he now has blunt teeth to bite with!

Wednesday, 25 June 2014

Another Fine mess You Got me Into

A huge part of what I do now is rescuing animals, therefore, my FB newsfeed is full of animals that need help. I learnt a long time ago that you cannot save them all, however, if I can save one, and change their life forever it is a start. My mission is to rescue, my dream is that one day I will not have to.

So, the day started like any other, until I got a message from Miss H, now Miss H is special, not in a window licking, sunshine bus type way, but in a special type way. She is one of those people that like marmite, you either love or hate, I happen to love her.

Miss H has the biggest heart, and the largest personality, but I have a lot of time for her, so when she messaged panicking about a dog I listened. The dog in question had been found in a local town, nothing special, just a dog, but she had got herself into such a state.

She informed me that she was going to the area tonight to search for the dog, I asked do you know where the dog is "No" was the reply. Do you know the area "No" So, basically you are going to drive round the streets in search of a dog, with no idea where it is....."yes"

Fastforward to 9pm at night and there is me driving round with Miss H in my car, hanging chicken out of the window, screaming a dogs name. As it got darker, she got more upset and there was no dog. To cut a long story short, we ended up in a barranco in the pitch dark, searching for a dog, until she thought she heard a cat, that turned out to be a bird!

At this point I wanted to go home, and we left, with Miss H getting more upset by the minute. The next day we made 1000 phone calls, and thankfully one came through, I had the dog, and called Miss H. Who screamed, and shouted and cried, all with joy. She drove to meet her dog, and at that point I remembered why I do this.....Not only had she stepped up and gone in search of this street dog, but since then she has paid for everything, not once asking for everyone else to deal with the dog.

Buddy as he was christened is now searching for his forever home, and we are confident that he will find it soon. Thank you Miss H for giving me faith that not all human beings are a***holes, and for making me laugh every time we are together.

Monday, 23 June 2014

I have Done it Again!

What is it with my blog that seems to offend people, if you do not like what you read keep on walking. Yet the trolls seem to come back time and time again, typically to moan and complain about something. This time it was the expat blog that seemed to cause offence.

I don't name people in my blog, and if you want to make a guess about who it is then feel free. However, at least ask me, I have no issues telling you who it is, and too be honest the ex pat blog was a general blog  about a huge number of people.

However, one very silly little girl has been moaning about the blog, which too be honest I didn't know she could read so it surprises me a little. If you read the blog to get a few laughs at my expense, or with me then great, but if you pop on over just to have a moan please keep on walking!

So to clarify.........I blog about things that fall out of my mouth, if you do not like these opinions please fill out a complaints form and stick the post!

Wednesday, 18 June 2014

Come for the eggs....leave with petrol!

Visitors are something that I am getting more and more of, and if I like you that is a bonus. I will help anyone, and have over the years given numerous things to people that have needed them far more then me. However, when I allowed a guy that I had only just met to syphon the petrol from my car it was a first! 

A friend came up with her other half, I have known her for some years, but this was the first time I had really met him. They are a lovely couple and we chatted for some hours about every topic you could imagine. Including the fact that her car was extremely low on petrol. 

Mrs N was convinced she could roll all the way to the petrol station, Mr T not so much! Thankfully we are on the top of  a huge mountain, so rolling was possible, but in their wisdom they had parked on the drive, with the petrol tank tipping in the wrong direction. 

So, when it came to them leaving the car was pointed in the wrong direction, and would not start. Cries for help were heard, and off we went to push, but pushing even the smallest car up hill was not working. I offered for Mr T t take my car to the petrol station, but he said he had a far better idea. 

Mr T decided that syphoning petrol from my car was far easier, oh how wrong was he. We provided the hose and the car whilst he had the petrol can and suction. As we all stood around watching and laughing, nothing happened, regardless of how much he sucked only a dribble came out. 

This resulted in Mr T getting a mouthful of petrol for his effort, and not a lot else. We decided to try pushing again, and this time Mrs N decided to take the 20KG sack of dog food out of the boot! thanks for that, why did you not think of that the first time! 

We managed to turn the car, and with it pointed in the right direction it started.....note to self please advise visitors to turn cars and point nose down the hill. Or maybe I should open a petrol station for those oh shit moments! 

Sunday, 15 June 2014

What is it with Ex pats!

When I moved here I knew I was  foreigner, therefore, I was always going to be treated differently. However, I made sure that all of us made the effort to join in with the local people. We embraced some of their traditions, enjoyed some of their foods (not gofio!) and made sure that the kids went to Canarian schools.

Regardless of how much you live within the local community and make an effort, there is no denying the fact that we are immigrants. Some Canarians embrace you, others hate you, and no matter what you do this will never change. But making an effort is what it is all about, why move here if you want to watch Eastenders, eat british foods, and refuse to speak the language.

Why do the brits feel they are better than any other nation and that people should change for them. if you do not like the country you live in, move, simple as that. Do not move to a foreign country and then moan about the culture, food, weather and people. When the foreigners do this in the UK, everyone is up in arms, but it is perfectly acceptable for Brits abroad to do everything they moan about all the time.

In typical expat style there was a rant on FB recently, and I simply cringed and thought just go home to your 3 bed terrace, in the rain, with your 2.4 children where you can moan about everything there. This lady was basically moaning about the Spanish partying, on the night of the Spain game in the world cup.

Do I care about football NO, but the Spanish do, and it is lovely to see them enjoying themselves, as one whole community. So, for the lady that moaned about the noise, why don't you turn off your British TV, put down your cup of tea, get off your arse and join in, you never know you may have fun!

This blog was brought to you on behalf of the foreigners that live on this island and DO make an effort. Oh,and because Mrs L, inspired me to with her rant on Fb about expats........Why did I not comment on the pointless post ahhhh because I have this Blog, which will not result in me pissing fraggles off and getting banned from FB!

Thursday, 5 June 2014

Rehab is Working........

Sorry for the lack of blogs, I have been so busy, I have had my older son over, work has gone mental, and needless to say chaos continues here! Although the title may suggest it, I have not been in rehab, but  was very good the other day.

Number one son wanted to go to the beach, therefore, I was designated taxi driver. So, we set off down the hill, on the way, like any other drive, until I heard it. I heard it from a distance, and as I rounded the corned, it was really loud. I drove past, but had to stop.

I slowly reversed the car, and looked up, and there stood bleating was a baby goat on the mountain. My first instinct was to turn off the engine, get out of the car, and grab said baby goat. However, I happened to glance at my son, who had this look of do NOT step out of the car.

For that brief moment I sat completely still deciding...goat...son....goat...son...the son won and I continued down the hill.  There are times when you have to act normal in front of other people. This was one of those occasions, and I proved that the rehab is working, I can drive somewhere without getting an animal....I did return after I had dropped him off, but no baby goat.